Monday, April 03, 2006

Road Journal Pt 2


Monday, April 03

15:00 Woke up in fetal position, wedged between mini-fridge and propane tank. Stepped on mousetrap(!) and potato chips (?) on the way to bathroom. Mysterious.
Why was bathroom door taped shut? Why is bathroom window open, and why does it smell like Celine Dion in here?

15:15 Read previous journal entries. Am convinced the espresso was moldy or something. I was obviously a tiny bit impaired. Expect to regain full command of RV and English language after a breakfast of strong tea, and one of those lovely brownies.
Bless Dawn!

16:00 Back on the road, feeling optimistic. This will be a nice get away from my usual routine. Must call home, check in.

16:20 Starting to think my tea was tainted…….that’s silly. I’m probably still a little ill from whatever it was that disagreed with me last night. To be safe, I’m engaging the autopilot/GPS feature Q installed in the RV. Heh heh….look at all the capitalized letters….ahem….engaging autopilot now. All well at home, mum watering plants.

16:55 Really glad this thing knows where we’re going.

15:00 hee hee hee hee he he he ZZZZZZZZzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

19:12 what? Did somebody say…….where?............
19:17 ok……head clearing…….REALLY hungry…………autopilot engaged, unnamed state border 20 minutes away. Better clean up as to be presentable to border guards.

19:43 RV vacuumed, litter dropped in roadside barrel, feeling much more the thing after eating. Approaching border now.

20:03 What friendly doggies! Wagging tails, barking, standing up to lick my face—the guards are being dicks—searching RV, running ID check

20:05 Back on my way, after border guard found my letter from Kurt. I think he wet himself. So this is what it’s like to be in an unnamed state, on a blogging assignment, and just about 24 hours away from meeting a person who may be the most evil mastermind ever, or possibly a really nice guy that likes fish, collects stamps, and works in a porno store.
It could go either way.

3 comments:

M said...

I hopt Todd is what he claims to be. I think I can speak for everybody when I say I need to believe in Todd.

Anonymous said...

Those border doggies have prepared you well for the type of welcome you can expect from Todd.

delta said...

A most evil mastermind in an unnammed state? I hope not, I cannot abide yet more competition.

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