Thursday, January 27, 2005

Inspired by Gatochy's Exercise In Logic

You should stop reading this and follow the link to Gatochy and the Exercise in Logic posting, if you've not yet read it.http://gatochy.blogspot.com/ All done reading it yet? Okay--I'll be patient.............
Ok, now that we are all on the same topic---
I posed this question to my very wise friend, Sandy. She was a BIT iccked-out by the subject--very moral is our Sandra, and very wise-- she immediately made a very astute observation: marriage between gay siblings is somewhat pointless/unneccesary. Marriage provides a legal relationship--two unrelated people become next of kin. Siblings already enjoy a legally recognized relationship-- no fears of being excluded from hospital rooms due to "not being family", as many gay couples have. I don't know enough about the legal rights/responsibilities of sibs to take this observation any further, but I think our Sandra has again shown her exellent reasoning abilities. And kudos to Gatochy (as ever) for posing the first original conundrum I've seen in memory. And I got to put the inevitable link to her page at the start of this post, instead of working out a sly way to segue to it towards the end. Speaking of sly segues-- Delta has given us a wee taste this week--jump on it!http://deltaavidelta.blogspot.com/ Hope he gives us details of his REM adventure........sigh.......REM!.........envy,envy.....enjoy yerself, boyo!

I got tagged!

Taking the spirit stick from Gatochy......
Random 10:
1. "Wild is the Wind"--Nina Simone
2. "Les Serviettes Noirs"--Frank Zappa
3. "Natural Born Killers" soundtrack - Trent Reznor/various artists
4. "Don't Give Up"--Peter Gabriel/Kate Bush
5. "Imagine"--John Lennon--covered by A Perfect Circle--sounds great in a minor key
6. "Kashmir"--Led Zeppelin
7. "Carmina Burana"--Carl Orff
8. "Slow Like Honey"--Fiona Apple
9. "Skating Away"--Jethro Tull
10. "Inion/Daughter"--Afro Celt Sound System

1. What is the total amount of music files on your computer?
Eight playlists--all massage music: I use my computer as a massage tool

2.The last CD you bought is:
Liquid Mind-:Balance-- again with the massage--notice a theme here?

3.What is the song you last listened to before this message?
Don't know the name--something hypnotic w/ flutes and drums--Japanese, I think--it was at.....massage school. I have no other life currently:)

4. Write down five songs you often listen to or that mean a lot to you.
"The Love Thieves"--Depeche Mode
"Pride(In the Name of Love) - U2
"Station to Station"--David Bowie
"Cornflake Girl"--Tori Amos
"Born to Be Wild"--Steppenwolf

5. Who are you gonna pass this stick to (three persons and why)?
Sputty--can't function without his tunes; Casey b--I like his original compositions; mandita--cuz I love and miss her!.

Saturday, January 22, 2005

Edd

Statistical probabilities are you would have loved my brother, Edd. He was one of those over-the -top, "larger than life" types. At his wake, I recall people of all ages,gender,race, nationality,social strata,etc--it was as if a cross section of the world's population had been collected. He never really understood what he was to the people in his life. Ex-biker,Viet Nam vet (Nixon's secret campaign in Cambodia),photographer,bar tender, mechanic extrordinaire,patron of the arts,hopeless romantic in denial, defender of the defenseless--he was intense.

Our Ma went back to work teaching school when I was about a year old, and Edd--then 11, was my primary care giver. Poor bastard! My first vivid memory of Edd is of pistol whipping him when I was 18 months old. WARNING:TERRIFYING TALE OF EVIL BABY ANTICS
It was a weekend afternoon, and Edd was home alone with me. He'd parked me in front of the television with a toy cap pistol in my baby mitt, and an old cowboy serial on TV. Figuring I'd be amused by seeing guns on the tele AND in my wee hand, he went into the next room, book on the floor as he read--head dangling over the edge of his bed. CUE MENACING MUSIC Every time the cowboys fired their pistols in the film, I fired mine. It was a bit dull, as there were pointless bits of people talking and riding horses in between the important, infant amusing discharge of weapons. Suddenly, something new to learn was offered to my budding limbic system. New use of tools--I saw a character pistol whipped.
CUE "THUS SPAKE ZARATHUSTRA" wow! I could do something completely unanticipated with my toy gun--I'd never even imagined it could be put to use in such a way. I recall the process of my thoughts--this is something new--i have to do it to remember it--i'm aware there were things i wanted to remember but lost without a chance to do them. Doing = keeping knowledge of. Better be off to find someone's head lest this be lost,too.
No malice--just pure, blood chilling innocent child development. Tiny baby steps of the lurking menace in booties. Soft snore of the unaware victim, head just exactly at baby shoulder height. Delight at finding convenient cranium so readily. Take a breath, gun in hand, abduct arm from torso, wait for it....aim.....SWING! SWING! SWING! As his scalp parted in an explosion of red, his fist swung up sharply and into my feral little face. He was a stout lad, my brother, so my tiny vicious butt was propelled backwards and slightly UP into the wall behind me, my nose at a sideways angle on my face. In a cartoon, I would have turned into a Picasso briefly before I started howling. I just got on with the screaming. As I'm exercising the lungs-blood spewing from nose--Ma comes home. CUE CARTOON SFX It was like something out of Tex Avery--huge saucer eyes, hair on end--Edd clutching the crown of his head as it oozed, stumbled over to me and set my broken nose in one swift move. Ma nearly died on the spot.

He took his class picture that year with a large bare patch in his scalp--and stitches. There were other class pictures to come ,bearing witness to his rough handling at the hands of his hell spawn ward. He wanted to put me in the front yard on a chain, give me a tire to teethe on, and post a warning sign ATTACK BABY ON GROUNDS

He managed to survive our family, and went on to have many colorful exploits--so many tales to tell.
He was generous to fault-- never turned down a friend in need--and he had many friends.

It's going on two years since he copped the big split.
He died of complications from hep-c contracted during his military duty. He died at home, with his best friend holding him. I take comfort in that.

To this very day, I don't like guns. They make my face hurt.

Miss ya, Edd.


Horrible, Horrible, HORRIBLE Ideas


Blue Velvet--The Series.

Tune in as wacky sadistic drug addict Frank Boothe (Dennis Hopper) kidnaps someone else close to Dorothy Valens (Isabella Rosalini) in his comic attempts to bind her to his twisted will. This week, Dorothy's boarding school gym teacher (Bea Arthur) is taken hostage, with comic misadventures aplenty.


The Crying Game--The Series

Tune in as Fergus (Stephen Rea) disguises Dil (Jaye Davidson) as something different each week in their comic attempts to stay one step ahead of Jude (Miranda Richardson)--the laughs never stop!

Riverdance--On Ice!

Too scary to review


Not treating yourself to the latest posting by Gatochy

save yourself! click the link! http://gatochy.blogspot.com/


Missing Delta's words of wit

How can you even form the thought?

http://deltaavidelta.blogspot.com/

Thursday, January 20, 2005

Things To Do Without Fail



1. Lay in vast supply of stomache soothing agents.
Inauguration. Dyspepsia happens.

2. Review emergency plan in case of Schwarzenegger presidency.
I have him to thank for my new found superstitious savagery. I dismissed an astrologer friend's claim that I would leave the country of my birth forever in my 40's. I owe her an appology for dissin' her astrology--Arnold's made a monkey out of me. Some of my 20-something friends here worship the man, as he was their childhood hero. Okay, but that doesn't justify a constitutional over- haul to further his political ambitions. If your main criteria for a presidential candidate is that they be an actor we've all seen starkers in the films, won't you please consider Ewan MacGregor?

3. Sell my Harley
The mainstreaming of HD is nauseating. I draw the line at the sodding DOLLS.

4. Sell Mattel my plans for the Marylin Manson Barbie.
It's just a matter of time until american culture engulfs/digests/excretes him. If Bob Hope hadn't assumed room temperature, MM would no doubt wind up in a USO tour---wearing campier, less tasteful attire------croaking " we're all stars now--in Bob Hope's show"

5. Thank Bono for saying "fuck" on american primetime television.
The FCC has relaxed language guidelines due to this. The copulative no-no can be said now, as long as it's not in a sexual way. For instance, I could go on the air and say " my pet sheep is gone, and I fucking miss it", but not "I miss fucking it". Not that I would.

6. Bow toward Helsinki and the blogging dojo of sensei Delta. He's whipped up another serving of bloggerific delight (Delta--like Proust,but funny! Like Wodehouse, but Irish! Like Wilde, but straight!)
Since you've been good, you may click on the link http://deltaavidelta.blogspot.com/

7. Bow towards Lisbon and the temple of Gatochy. This woman is on fire! She's been jaw-droppingly productive this week; lots to enjoy, and don't neglect to congratulate her on her recent blacklisting. She's up there with Anais N, Lillian H, and Dorothy P. But you knew that. http://gatochy.blogspot.com/

8. Make up with Stroppy and Snarky--twin muses of the rant.
Since they gave me what for and split yesterday, all I can compose are these blogging lists! For blog's sake!

Tuesday, January 18, 2005

Io Ironia!

W's big swearing in soiree is freaking me out. 1300 troops and police, anti-aircraft,coastguard,video survailance,men with guns looking like doberman pinschers with a grudge-- how sadly ironic the "leader of the free world" is taking oath in the centre of a bully-boy fascist macho display of paranoia and aggression. I really don't know, there could be some terrorist nutter waiting to pull a kamikazi on the event--and I do mean "nutter". Anyone that would fuck with W is clearly not of sound judgment. He's shown the world he has balls enough to make up what he lacks in brains. That's a WHOLE lot of balls, ya'll. I was living here in Texas when he was Governor, and he executed more of his constituants than anyone else had before--and in Texas, that's saying something. Don't provoke this guy. He's scary.
I'm out of steam. Stroppy and Snarky, the twin muses of the rant, just left in a huff. Seems they spend a great deal of time flying, and have encountered the probing digit of democracy's defense a bit too often, and want nothing to do with any endeavor that may put them at risk of further indignity. Uh-oh, I may be in some difficulty here. They've returned, looking disheveled and thoroughly brassed off. At me. Oops.

Blogito, Ergo Sum

I must admit, this medium has enriched my life. I've become a dilletante blog-o-phile, combing through listings seeking out the funny, insightful, challenging or just plain groovy pages people are creating. What an egalitarian form of tele-communication--free speech and self expression at your finger tips, have at it. Some canny individuals have sussed out a source of free advertising, others serve a glimpse into lives and worlds diverse and wonderful. I wish I read more than one language.
I came across Gatochy's blog first--good intro. It was during an image search, as her blog has art aplenty. She has a fluid way with words and a sharp intellect--it's like reading a really good magazine--lots to look at, something good to read, and the links on her page have given me hours of fun. She's a treasure, look in on her http://gatochy.blogspot.com/ and see what I'm on about.
Delta's blog Feckless in Finland is sort of the germinator of my own blogging efforts. I came across it while adding content to a Yahoo page. He, too has a way with words, witty gritty and funny as feck. I was enjoying one of his when I found the buttons up top, so you could say I caught blogging from Delta. Look in on him http://deltaavidelta.blogspot.com/ and remember, blogging is contagious.
Reading Alice X's blog Tales from a Delusional World is a bit like a visit from a younger sibling, reminding you of your own struggles with sentience and free will. Read the entry of nov 29th 2004 "Gareth"--a sensitive obit of a coworker--for evidence that modern life has yet to destroy the human soul. http://www.delusionalworld.blogspot.com/
Wouldn't it rock if the Dalai Lama kept a blog?

Friday, January 14, 2005

Nu?

Firstly--the name of this blog page "I'd Rather Be here Now" is an inside out tribute to the Transmetropolitan comic series--Spider Jerusalem's column is called " I Hate It Here". I'm TRYING to be a BIT more positive.....To that end, today may prove a spectacular failure.
I know, I should simply avoid television altogether. The Today show has had a bad couple of days. Yesterday it was the poor gent in California who'd lost his family in the mudslide after making a valiant effort to rescue them. The entire event was captured by news cameras, and still the anchor asked him what he felt when he learned his wife and 3 children were dead. I would have loved a response like " I felt betrayed and exposed to morbid scrutiny by the media--oh, wait, that's what I'm feeling NOW"--for fuck's sake, what do you suppose one might feel at a time like that? This isn't news.

Today(no intentional pun) it was a story about outrage at Playboy's plan to offer "soft core" porn(words used in the story) for cell phones. "Won't somebody please think of the children!"(deliberate Simpsons reference)-- this is also not news. I did an experiment while I watched the broadcast. I took my cell phone, accessed Google with safe search off, and did an image search using the word "porn"-- the first image that came up was of a woman on all fours.....Have you seen "Chasing Amy"? Ok, then--finger cuffs. Yep. The stuff in the report that had chicken little bent out of shape was mega-tame compared to what's already available on many cell phones. No honey, the sky's not falling--it's been underfoot some time already.
Instead you might squawk over your children being exposed to boorish insensitive behavior. You don't want them growing up with no respect for someone's private grief, do you?
I DON'T hate it here...I DON'T hate it here... I DON'T hate it here.......oh......excuse me....I need to go sit in the corner and rock...............I DON'T hate it here....I DON'T hate it here.......

What Is Your Battle Cry?

Hark! Who is that, skulking amidst the freeway! It is Taarzaan, hands clutching a mighty sword! He grunts gutterally:

"I'm going to smash you beyond capacity, and then some!!"

Find out!
Enter username:
Are you a girl, or a guy ?

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Thursday, January 13, 2005


I have a sense of humor--its around here somewhere....... Posted by Hello

An introductory rant

Welcome, sportsfans--to the World Series of Uncomfortable Silences.

Heya!! Thanks for stopping in. Would you like a cup of tea? Go fix one if you like, the worst that may happen while you are away is your screensaver displaying. Not that I have anything against your screensaver, mind you. I'm certain its lovely--holiday snaps, maybe your pet in an adorable pose, or maybe you've downloaded your favorite celeb or sports team. Hopefully it isn't that appalling one you posted on your Yahoo adult profile--the one of your bits? Sorry, hate to bring up such a sore topic--so! How's the tea?
I've only just become a member of the computer-having tribe since November '04. I purchased it with money I saved out of my student loan(I'm 44,thanks) after I bought a used massage table from a workmate at the psychiatric hospital. That's where I WORK, thank you!
I'm a massage therapy student--that explains the table bit.
Anyway, back to me being all new and stuff to this technology.......
I've been reading on line personals. PHEW! Let me say this: I'm grateful to be informed of all the appalling habits and kinks before risking contact. This may very well lead to a better world.
Imagine a world where you know ahead of time that the person you are meeting tonight shares your love of BDSM or other paraphilia. Or conversely, a world where you need not fear that your date may at anytime whip out some frightening request/demand/desperate appeal, or even more frightening paraphenalia. Thanks to this astounding technology, we may one day live in a world with a bit less rejection, apprehension and unpleasant surprizes.
The concept of bounderies seems to be undergoing a transformation. The most current manifestation is the "air quotes" reality programs, going back to MTV's real world. Reality surrounds us in all directions at all times. No need for a TV or cable connection--your senses are all you need. I worry that children growing up in this voyeuristic/exhibitionistic social climate may become the rudest generation ever. In my imagination, there is this poor sad television executive weeping with self loathing and disgust at the viewing public. I imagine him trying desperately to concoct a programm so loathsome and soulless that the audience will wake up from their tele-trance and find their own buddha nature out of sheer survival instinct. I imagine him sobbing as the lowest common denominator descends further and further as he awaits his hoped for come-uppance. Poor imaginary bastard! Do him a favor and spare yourself the toxic exposure. Communication is not about one-liners. Movies are not reality. Celebrities are not better, smarter or more beautiful than you. This I firmly hold to be true.
Sorry for the soapbox rant--I'll try to be funny next time. namaste

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