Something to Blog About

Hey! How are you! Wow, it's been-what? About a million years since an update, right?
Things have been very interesting. I found a dead raccoon, for starters. What is so interesting, as opposed to disgusting, about that? Well, it had apparently committed suicide. Where it ever learned to tie a noose, I'll never know.
And speaking of shocking news, guess what? Go ahead, guess away.
Nope. No. Wrong. How rude. No. No. And, NO!
Ok, I'll spill.........someone is coming to visit the wanna-be major American city I live in.
"So", you may say, "don't people often visit your quaint little 'berg?"; to which I can only reply "well, yeah---but not like THIS person". So there, smarty. With that kind of attitude, I might just keep my little secret. Hum dee dum dum dum, la la la la la laaaaaaa.......................
What? Oh, are you still here? What? Who might it be, you ask? Do you really want to know?
Ok, I'll tell you.
[ahem] It is with mixed pleasure and apprehension that I tell you...........what are you looking at?
Oh, that. Yes, my hair looks weird. I asked Mei-mei to help me trim it, and she thought I meant chop most of the length off the back. Yes, it looks silly. No, I'm not getting it "fixed", I'm just going to gel it to death until the back grows out again---that way the front will be longer, and it will all tie up neatly. Why grow it if I'm only going to tie it up, you ask? Why are you all up in my business? What's it to you? What's that? You think I'm stalling? You think maybe no one of interest (other than the douche bag entertainment industry vermin that swarm in for sux by sux worse) would ever set foot here in this oasis of hipster mediocrity? Ok---enough trivial dead raccoon hair tragedy minutia.
The person of interest, the one leaving the relative comfort of their very own domicile to travel to this geographic location is------wait for it, even better---scroll down....................................................................................................................

















Kurt-Kurt-Kurty-Kurt-KURT!!!!!

Couldn't you just die? Well don't---not here, anyway----I still have a dead raccoon to remove.