Phrontistery Phun Phollow Up

We here at IRBHN World Head Quarters would never ignore a mandate from the reading public. We may not respond appropriately, but we would never ignore something like that.

"Mandate?", you may ask----"What mandate?". Well, if you don't call two requests for pronunciation a mandate, then I am stuck for something to write about puzzled as to your definition of "mandate" (something like a "guy crush"?).

When investigating the proper pronunciation of obsolete words, one must use the proper tools---in this case, our trusty ouija board. We made contact with Samuel Johnson and Noah Webster (separately, as we have but one functioning ouija board, and the thought of the unholy row those two might get into.....)

Samuel Johnson: Damn you, sir! Damn your sorcery!! What heretical jackanapery is this? What? You want the pronunciation of words no longer used???? Are you serious?? Think, man---if they are no longer is use, how then would anyone know if you mispronounce them? Now be off--I've reincarnated as a trophy wife in Tokyo, and I'm about to go do something that always gets me diamonds.

Noah Webster: beep! You've reached the afterlife voice mail of Noah Webster--sorry we can't take your call at this time, as we've recently reincarnated in Tokyo, and are busy enjoying the attentions of a trophy wife and buying diamonds.

So--I'm going to "wing it"--

alabandical-- al-uh-ban-dik-ul
amarulence-- ah-mar-yoo-lence
aretaloger--air-ret-tall-oh-jer
brabeum--bray-bee-um
brephophagist--bref--foe--fage-ist
celeberrimous--sell-i-berry-mus
defedate--def-feh-date
drollic--drole-ick
gnathonize--nath-un-eyes
hemerine--hem-mer-een