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Dear Santa,
Just a quick note--first, sorry about last year. That feud with the tooth fairy caused me to calibrate the security system to be extra sensitive to supernatural anthropomorphic manifestations. My commitment to the extinction of that dental douche bag blinded me to larger issues, and I apologize. I hope you are feeling better by now.
Second, I wanted to let you know that the IRBHNWHQ has been invaded by tropical birds.
Two of them. Don't be afraid of them, but don't get too close, either--they are evil.
And lastly---you'll find the money and the name of the target by the milk and cookies. Try to make it look like an accident.
5 comments:
I need more details on the feud. I love the word feud...
i think someone needs to work on his Christmas cheer a little more.
Like Peace and Joy instead of 'hit men' and "make it look like an accident!"
Mrs. Klausenjausen
(my assumed Christmas name)
Everyone hates that damn tooth fairy.
My daughter wanted to be a tooth fairy when she grew up until someone told her that she collects teeth to build her house. That just grossed her out and it's no longer her life's ambition.
Eww ... the tooth fairy builds a house out of nasty old teeth? Teeth so rotten they must be removed from or fall out of your mouth. ?
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