Sunday, December 31, 2006

Cyber Thanks to All My Generous Friends

Dear Mariana;
Thank you for the groovy gifts! The lobster is wiggling at me as I type this; the froggie will be opening the new years beverages, and the music box is the coolest thing anyone has ever given me. The tune is haunting--like something from a movie. I can just imagine a full orchestra taking up the melody----thank you!!!!
Dear Rob;
Thank you for the Pythons Autobiography by the Pythons book. It is giving me a different angle on my favorite anglos. You know me too well!
Dear Sandy;
Thank you for the newest fiction by Terry Pratchett! It was you that first got me started on him, all those years ago, when I got sick of fiction. You found one of the only fiction writers I enjoy. I'll try to read it slowly.
Dear Amber;
Thank you for the Hammer Horror box set. I know they are lost on people your age, but these were once considered very scary. The studio had a huge impact on me--much of my early photography and video work was homage/pastiche/rip offs of Hammer films. You've made me very happy!
Dear Dawn;
Thanks for the groovetastic t-shirt! It was thoughtful to design an original for me--"I'll take things only I know for $1000, Alex"--I can't begin to calculate how many times I've heard you say that while we were hanging out. It's comfy, too--I can't decide whetther to keep it special as a lounging shirt or what. Ma thinks it's pretty funny, too.
Dear Bart and Laura;
Thanks for all the cool stuff! I was happy with the monkey candy molds, then came the doll's house toilet and television. And if that wasn't enough fun--Dr. Terrible's House of Horrible!! Too funny, and what a companion to Amber's gift. You two should be spanked.
Dear Justin;
Thank you for whatever it is that still hasn't arrived. I have a pretty good idea, and I'm sure to plotz when it gets here. Don't feel bad--Mariana is still waiting for her gift from me to arrive. There were many mail snafus this season. Stop punishing yourself. Oh--you dress like that on purpose. never mind.
Dear Karen;
Than you for the book on Fang Shui, or feng shui for cats. It will come in handy for the new kitty, whenever it manifests its furry little self.
Dear Kala;
Thank you for the rune stones. They are a gorgeous shade of orange, and the bag you made for them is great!
Dear Shannon;
Thank you for the books! It was great to receive the entire series, specially after you had me read the first one. I'm looking forward to our swap on monday. Are you sure you and Kala have to move to Alaska? I'll be happy to take legacy clients, but I'd rather enjoy you two's company.
Dear Rahshemah;
Thank you for the groovy giant crystal and agate stand. It totally rocks(PUN!!)

Sunday, December 24, 2006

I've Been Tagged!

Sebastien(http://chronicallysickbutstillthinking.blogspot.com/ )tagged me with the Christmas meme---list 3 things you'd like for xmas, followed by 3 things you wouldn't want. The second 3 are easy............well, easier, anyway......

Taarzaan's Wish List

1. A new vehicle. I am having "issues" with my truck. I'd like to be free of the anxiety--will it start?--so something reliable that I can shlep in.
2. The Xena box set. I love the freewheeling way they reinterpreted everything, from Homer to the Torah and the Vedas. Screw accuracy, we're telling a story, durn it!
3. ooooh, tough going----either a new vacuume cleaner, or a bass amp. If you find an amp that also cleans the floors, even better--as opposed to an amp the "just sucks".

Things I Wouldn't Enjoy

1. Magazine subscriptions. Seriously. My gran used to give everyone Reader's Digest. I loved my gran, but really.
2. Cologne. Not the place, the substance--again, gran flashback. She always gave this horrid lime scented stuff that made my cat gag. One should select one's own scent.
3. Anything motion activated that sings a holiday tune.

Who shall I tagg? Sadly there is no one--all my blogger friends (with the exception of sensei Delta) have already done this, and none of my monkey minions can type very well. I should have wished for more blogger friends to pass this on to. Oh, well........
I'm in holiday food prep mode today. I just finished baking the "pigs in blankets"--it's hard getting a pig to stay wrapoped up in a blanket, and as for stuffing it in the oven--good luck! Instead, I'm using wee "sausages", and wrapping them in "dough". Next, I'm on to the cookies. After that, it's baked brie with mushrooms and chives. Later, it will be time to make the gingerbread men. Then I'll be busy chasing them. "you can't catch me!"--we'll see about that.......

Thursday, December 21, 2006

Wednesday, December 20, 2006

Behold the Butterflies of CEU Compliance


These guys each represent 6 hours of continued education. Ariana, the CEU provider, gives these out along with the certificates. If you get audited, don't try to mail in the butterflies.
I'm ready for another year in my new career. My insurance is paid up, CEUs covered, license renewal check cleared--all's clear for the new year.

Saturday, December 16, 2006

"Tis STILLL The Season: Baking Jag/Amber's Fabulous Ruby Slippers

Ok--First the baking jag. This cake pan totally speaks LOUDLY to my inner child--lucky little bastard. It reminds me of a sand castle mold my Ma gave me when I was 6. I've been making cake castles--it's loads of fun, and people enjoy receiving them. Plus, you can play Godzilla while you have dessert.
Next month at my birthday, I'm going to combine 4 of them into a large sprawling castle, and we shall lob grapes at it with spoons--prizes to the invader who gets them most direct hits.

Amber's faboo ruby slippers--a gift from me, via her wishlist. She put them right on, and did a little happy dance. She is so prosh! She's smiling because I also gave her the fabulous tiny globe pendant in a silver cage--again from her wishlist.
She gave me a collection of 6 Hammer Horror films--from my wish list.



Powdered sugar makes edible snow on Castle Chocula.

Wednesday, December 13, 2006

Get Well Soon, Gatochy!

My most favoritest kitty on the entire European continent is having surgery again. Her humans are two of the most loving, devoted, and generally kick ass pet parents on earth-- we send love and support to the entire Gatochy family--be well soon, miss kitty! Hang in there, Mariana and Prince Charming!

Friday, December 08, 2006

"Tis the Season for O Henry-like Situations


My ma was 2 when the stockmarket crashed in 1929. My grandparents were resourceful and hardworking, and the family made it through the great depression, and held on to values that developed during and because of it.
On some basic level, Ma is expecting another great depression. She is cautious with money, but far from miserly or withholding.
Her gift giving reflects her early life experience, when she and her closest brother would save things they came across during the year as Christmas gifts. This year she had a money clip from the 70's and a freebie calendar for my surviving brother. She wasn't really satisfied with the calendar, and the money clip turned out to be damaged and not giftable. Although she didn't make a big scene about it, it was obvious to me that she was deeply disappointed and upset. I got a real sense of her younger self, and the deep caring that goes in to her every gesture. Although her judgment has often been extremely poor, her intentions have always been the best. So I got pretty choked up about her being choked up about not having a gift for my brother. Still with me?
I dug out a money clip given to me by our late brother. My two brothers were a year apart, and always close, so I felt that it would be far more meaningful to my surviving brother. Ma was very pleased to have a replacement, and I suggested that we design a calendar ourselves to go with it. Ma went through old family photos, and came up with a concept for each month. She sat here at the computer with me and played art director. The above image is her December collage--we decorated the doll'shouse.

Sunday, December 03, 2006

WTF #2: Recumbent Bikes

Recumbent bikes---I don' trust 'em--I tink der up to somethin..........but seriously, wtf?
Bicycling is supposed to be a healthy pursuit. So let's design a bike that makes it more hazardous. Let's lower the sight line--no worries, we'll just stick a flag on it--people are sure to see that. And let's have your head right where you can suck up the car exhaust--it's right there in front of your face--breath deep! Also, the head is now conveniently at bumper level--let's have a round of concussions with neck trauma for everyone!
And why do the people I see laying in these bloody things look so smug?

Saturday, December 02, 2006

'Tis The Season For Eye Strain


This is the wee tiny stocking I just made for Ma's doll's house--it's so much easier to decorate on the small scale, but sewing two of these 1 inch by a half inch stockings took a toll on my eyes. I'll be 46 next month, and seeing weensy things close up is not as easy as it once was--even threading the needle was a fun game of chance and skill. But I got a much bigger sense of accomplishment--plus, I felt just like the tailor in the Beatrix Potter story that made the tiny clothes for the mice. Harmlessly crazy.

WTF? No. 1--'tis The Season to Wonder WTF


Okaaaaaaaay...........this is really straining the seams of bad taste. Imagine you suddenly awaken in a bathroom (hasn't happened to me in years, thank you), and this is the first thing you see. After your scream of esthetic horror stops echoing off the tiles, you have a moment to gather your shaken wits--think, think, think--what kind of monster's lair have you stumbled into? Probably elderly (good--easy to run away from), definately caucasion.......after that, it's all guess work. Just climb out the bathroom window before they come to investigate the screams--on second thought, they're no doubt used to them by now--just go. If you can't get out the window, play Santa and flush yourself.
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