Wednesday, October 26, 2005

Random Update/ more on my CV/school's nearly done



Phew!! Finished my shiatsu practicum last night--I believe I did well, as the grader/instructor gave me praise at the end. Randy--our instructor (who flew in from chicago--and are his arms tired) is great--looks a bit like the bastard lovechild of Ozzy Osborn and Tommy Lee, and knows that shiatsu cold. Glad it's done with, all the same. School will be over in a week (I still have a make up night the week after graduation), and work is beginning to trickle in, much gratitude to all! I've a client this evening, an interview with a chair massage company this friday, and next thursday I'll be doing a 4 hour chair gig that the lovely Dawn hooked me up with. Bless you,love!
OK-- as it's nearly Samhain (that's pronounced "sah-when") or Halloween, I'd like to take a moment to tell a tale of fear--for pay. Yep, this is a memeory of working at the haunted house I alluded to in the previous post.
My two favorite memories are of working the Frankenstein's lab scene--as the creature, naturally. I'm large, so it was only fitting that I be cast as the monster. To make me even larger, they worked up a pair of stilted boots that made me stand about 6'8", in addition to the head piece. Truly ghastly.
The majority of people who came through were already frightened--we just provided a backdrop for their fear to project upon. Made me almost feel guilty for accepting pay, as our clients had brought their fear with them. One such group was atrio of small boys, about 7-8 years of age. I saw them peer around the corner at the entrance to the scene--when the clapped eyes on Dr. F, the squealed and ran like hell toward the exit--where I was lurking. Not being an utter bastard, I didn't wish for them to encounter me in the darkened exit hall, so I clumped out into the light a few yards clear of the escape route. The smallest lad--clutched in the middle--punched me in the ribs as he was swept past by his larger siblings. I was so proud of him--he glared right at me, and swung his wee fist as hard as he could. Left a wee bruise and everything. I hope he brags about it, as it was quite brave of him.
Another night at the lab, I was working the scene alone while the good doctor skived off for a smoke. Lurking in my corner, I saw a pair of gents enter the scene, surveying the decore. I did my stomp and growl up to the pair-- a couple of gay gents, dressed quite alike, who gave me a very arch nod of the head, as if to say "yes, we see you--what of it?" My response was one of "oh, so I'm not scary,eh?" I growled in my best Karloff imitation:"Monster want new braaaaain. Want learn make bruuuuunch. appreciate operaaaaa. sing show tunes." The gents gave me a quite perterbed look, and scurried toward the exit. I called "wait! Monster having special feelings". The moral of the story--don't patronize the monsters, love. Even if you are someone I'd normally be sympathetic towards, have the manners to at least pretend you're slightly nervous, lest I improvise something more effective than my cliche costume.

4 comments:

Kurt said...

Best. post. ever.

Now tell me how to get rid of that giant knot under my left shoulder blade.

Trey said...

the culprit is most likely the scalenes muscles on the left side--a strong muscle that clings to the vertebrae of the neck. Trap the muscle by pinning it against the neck bones, lift your chin, and slowly rotate toward the right. it should be slightly to moderately uncomfortable while you do it, but the pain under the scapula should be lighter/gone. If that fails, come see me, or any other RMT trained in neck and shoulder release.

M said...

Oh yes, LOVE those sort of people who go in, not to enjoy something, but merely to snub it. I would have eaten their brains for real only, there probably wasn't much meat in them to begin with.

delta said...

Oiche Samhna maith agat! (Happy Hallowe'en!). Absolutely priceless, I wish I had that kind of quick wit. Great to hear you're saving the back of America, one trapped muscle at a time :)

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